Cora Prose Competition II - Community Event - Competition Thread

Joe wrote:

Allen1 wrote:lmfao. joe deserves a 10 day forum ban for that entry.

and u deserve a perm ban for being a cunt to everyone.

no lmao. i'm being a cunt exclusively to you.

Joe wrote:

Allen1 wrote:lmfao. joe deserves a 10 day forum ban for that entry.

and u deserve a perm ban for being a cunt to everyone.

why are you sad? cuz ur bae tunechi ain here?

OMG LOOOOOOL

JOE'S AND ABIGORS MADE ME LOL SO HARD FOR SOME REASON

Vote goes to abigor btw, felt like everyone else went try-hard

Skimmed these briefly at around 1 AM.

I'll read them more tomorrow.

However: Joe you didn't even talk about autocorrect lol...my thread even said to do that 3 times. Italicized. Capitalized. Colored. Big, bold font.

ScRuB


So far I've only read that, Abigor's, and a few others.

Feuer's introduction looks pretty good. An actual introduction! 

In high school teachers grade you on how well you introduce it as well as mechanics, usage, grammar, fluency, etc. I'll be judging it from that type of standpoint...although I do appreciate the comedic tone some of you have incorpated.

My points with some commentary:

Fuck, this took a while to write.

Bear in mind that all of this is simply my opinion and I merely tried to give an honest review, no harm intended.

1 point - Joey - I concur with the GreatBanter hashtag. You didn't capture anyone's personality or speech pattern. The dialogue is lazy, uninspired and has nothing to do with the autocorrect topic whatsoever. Regardless, Zodz will probably be pleased to see an entire entry devoted against him.

2 points - Lord Abigor - There's probably a deserved award in here for managing to come up with something as disturbing and at the same time, hilarious. Due to the story lacking any logical narrative and the amount of disturbance caused by the read, I unfortunately can't give it more than 2 points.

3 points - Dump me - I think this story failed by taking on too much and trying to have 3 storywise unconnected punchlines to it. The only auto-correct joke I understood was the epi-pen one. Interesting enough, Lord Abigor also had an "epic penis" auto-correct in his entry, but I have no idea what the actual word was supposed to be there. I'm clueless to what the word behind the first autocorrect was and how the third punchline even fit in to the picture of autocorrect or the story. I'm confused on what the point of this story was. Imo it also had the tone of something that tried hard to be cutesy, but doing so, became cringeworthy.

4 points - Iamtaba - Well, everyone seems to love writing about Zodz today. The story's got a half-decent light absurd tone to it, but it doesn't do the trick for me. I would have at the very least wanted to see a believable autocorrect amidst the absurdness. I'm only giving it a 4 because a few decent lines held it a tiny bit higher than the other 3 entries.

5 points - Slash - You used a typo instead of autocorrect in your story. The concept remains the same so I won't mind. I loved the actual situation of Cannons accidentally saying Zodz makes him feel special. Very good. Unfortunately the rest of the story is weak, Zodz resigning out of pressure put on him over this is out of character and the situation unfolding along with the ending makes no sense with nothing in the story backing up that it's not supposed to make sense. No more than A for effort from me.

6 points - Taro Beast - As Slash's, you took the typo direction instead of autocorrect. I won't badger you for it either as the concept remains pretty much the same. You've got a decent story here. Average in all regards, but it's a full story, the typos are funny and it works. Well played and nice incorporation of Friday the 13th.

7 points - FeuerKaiser|Warriors - I got to give this one credit for a lot of things. The prose was well written, the story felt like a complete story with a beginning, a middle and an end while feeling that the beginning kicked off from the middle of something -- which is positive. I liked how the story had a message to it and remained believable in its execution. I could feel the mystery of who was behind the hacking and the moment Zodz succumbed to abusing the opportunity, good stuff. The flying boots link and a runite ore reference popping up threw in a good dose of humor in there. A similar attempt for that was probably Andy's password being zodzdemotenr4admin, which didn't work for me. I also thought that the ending paragraph got a little preachy, the message would have been obvious from the story. NR ANALOGY TIME. The story's got a well rounded face and a nice body, but it doesn't have legs to stand on. Autocorrect correcting a / to . is just unlikely and almost distant from the topic itself, resulting in a weak main plot point. The story still slumps by on a fairly advanced wheelchair, electronic perhaps. Not without flaws imo, but well done.

8 points - Eth111 - The story clicks exceptionally well along with a few legitimately amusing moments. Logically sound reasons are provided for not just the otherwise unlikely autocorrection, but also other minor story beats that give the story a complete feeling. The autocorrection because of those names often coming up for kicking them is kind of genious. I don't know whether bringing out the names James, Boofz and Moe as people who would quit due to this were intentional, but worked oh so well considering they're the ones that could indeed be upset over poor trial selections instead of them, who have waited for it for ages. The moment of ridiculing yourself as an ending joke was definitely worth using, I couldn't think of a better ending. Despite the prose and mechanics not being the strongest, the story rectified it all for me. Good work.

taro 8 - Taro won because 6/8 of the entries followed the same general plot. I had warriors winning in the beginning till all the other similar posts watered his down a lil
warriors 7 - psh zodz could cripple cora without andys pass
dump me 6 - bad grammar made it hard to read
eth 5 - ur beginning got my hopes up until it nose dived.
taba 4 - auto correct has to be somewhat close
slash 3 - the joke at the end made it somewhat better.
abigor 2 - curse words made it annoyingly unreadable
joe 1 - lol

*general note* I penalized on plot if the auto correct was so outrageous it wasnt believelable. Believability was pretty much most of the criteria.

http://gyazo.com/b890c102a138989982f13b91fb4f3031

Nr wrote:8 points - Eth111

im sorry but that is absolutely bull shit

Slash wrote:

Nr wrote:8 points - Eth111

im sorry but that is absolutely bull shit

Hm, agree to disagree.

An update to the competition: To avoid possible repetitiveness of the Cora Dyce rounds, I've decided that after the second Cora-themed round, the last two rounds of this competition will not be Cora-themed. This will add more variety to the competition and should be the last big update to how the tournament works. Apart from maybe some prizepool changes if we manage to pull in a donation or two... nudge nudge.

And we're waiting on Paul's votes to find out who wins the judge vote in round 1. Everyone's encouraged to read and vote for their favourite -- and also write something up for the next round that's already been released!

Joe wrote:Lord Abigor is really pissed off at me. LOL

HAHAHAHAAHAHAHHAHAAH.. relax bro,thats just for fun.. I still love you though

Dogs>Cats wrote:taro 8 - Taro won because 6/8 of the entries followed the same general plot. I had warriors winning in the beginning till all the other similar posts watered his down a lil
warriors 7 - psh zodz could cripple cora without andys pass
dump me 6 - bad grammar made it hard to read
eth 5 - ur beginning got my hopes up until it nose dived.
taba 4 - auto correct has to be somewhat close
slash 3 - the joke at the end made it somewhat better.
abigor 2 - curse words made it annoyingly unreadable
joe 1 - lol

*general note* I penalized on plot if the auto correct was so outrageous it wasnt believelable. Believability was pretty much most of the criteria.

http://gyazo.com/b890c102a138989982f13b91fb4f3031

Just 3 requests pls

- How is my story not-belivable
- How is my story not differ from the rest, i'm the only one who went the trial route if i read correctly
- What made my story particulary "nose dive"

Need constructive critisism for next prose i send in.

holy shit i got 4 points lol

i was expecting .5

thx guys love u <# !!

btw you should make the deadline a bit sooner

I laughed so hard at abigor's entry, I even shared it to my brother who laughed as well

My vote goes to him

lol these judges are just too serious abigor bro

I'll do better if there's an illuminati competition.

Iamtaba wrote:I laughed so hard at abigor's entry, I even shared it to my brother who laughed as well

My vote goes to him

hhaha thanks

Iamtaba wrote:lol these judges are just too serious abigor bro

i know man.. that hurts me a lot

Feuer #1

dump me - very creative, very relevant, very believable
least understandable - Slash
like reading a dream - eth111

funniest moments - "joe gets gen for free fk u", messsy not using commas correctly, "wasted 300m on your sluts"

Iamtaba wrote:btw you should make the deadline a bit sooner

Last time the deadlines were too short and almost nobody posted.

8 - FeuerKaiser/LMS/Paul/Warriors: Good solid story with an introduction and conclusion. It's obvious you spent some time and put some effort into this.

7 - Eth - LOL, love the references to the trials chosen. It was pretty realistic. I could see something like that happening if Andy actually made that mistake.

6 - Taro Beast: I enjoyed reading your story! A bit off topic, but good nonetheless. I always enjoy a story with some fancy vocabulary sprinkled here and there. 

5 - iamtaba:

iamtaba wrote: He's like "it's cool dawg, i'll fix this first thing tomorrow morning". However, Andy wasn't joking when he said he's gonna fix this tomorrow.

This part confused me. Isn't Zodz the one who said he'd fix it? It randomly switches to Andy. I like the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air reference.

4 - Slash: I feel like you kind of took the idea from the previous competition when you said that Cannons rises to power and then takes over Andy's spot. And again, LTU gets a rank somehow. o.o Sounds familiar.

3 - Dump Me: Hard to follow and grammar could be improved.

2 - Lord Abigor: Story was on topic (I think ) but it just didn't follow any real plot. Lots of weird things strung all over the place like his mom being in a coma...his dad being a prostitute and out of the blue committing suicide after being in a fight.

1 - Joe: Not even a real story... Just filled with dialogue.
No attempt to spell correctly; filled with internet slang (m8).
Veers off the topic of auto correct causing drama.
And finally...Xodz suddenly turns to Zodz somehow. Then Zodz turns to zodz. You could have at least kept the characters' names consistent.

u ppl just mad cuz illuminati.

Slash wins lmfao.

The elephant was a gem you ppl are missing.

Paul wrote:4 - Slash: I feel like you kind of took the idea from the previous competition when you said that Cannons rises to power and then takes over Andy's spot. And again, LTU gets a rank somehow. o.o Sounds familiar.

never happened but okay.